Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Bits of nothing-all negative so don't bother reading

Seems like I haven't posted for ages now. Too busy reading all the other wonderful sites to bother with my own trivia. Other blogs have profound thoughts, comedy, or creative genius. Mine just sucks. No theme, no inspiration, no literary genius. Just garbage. I'm sure I had some sort of idea in mind when I started this, but can't for the life of me figure out what the heck it was. Snivel and whine de jour I guess is all it boils down to.
I should be excited at the prospect of a new year, full of resolutions and promises for improvement. I should set my sites on achieving or learning something. I should set some deadlines for completion of the million things laying here half done. I should focus and stop being so scattered and generally uninterested in life. I should reflect on past screw ups and accept responsibility for my own failures.
I should stop rambling and get to some sort of point here. Hell, shoulda, coulda, woulda-not.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch...... I survived another birthday. Yeah, drum roll, violins, something. Never really got the whole birthday deal. Survived another year of the daily grind. Gifts usually amounted to what hadn't "arrived" in time for the Christmas giving, or senseless trinkets bought after folks realized they had to shop again so soon after the last go round. Or you do the "let's go out" deal where you are targeted as the idiot of the day, handed a piece of stale cake, have a too large hat shoved on your head, and forced to endure the loud strains of waiters renditions of Happy Birthday by voices who couldn't sing their way out of a paper bag. Meanwhile being viewed by hundreds of other people secretly thinking "thank God my family wouldn't do that to me". Add that to the fact that my father died two days after my birthday after needlessly suffering through two more days of pure hell, just so his daughter wouldn't remember her father died on her birthday. Sorry Dad. Thanks for the effort, but didn't really help. Aren't birthdays grand?
Prince Charming took it upon himself to decide that we needed new storm doors for our humble abode. Won't even tell you the ridiculously overpriced amount he paid for the two ugliest, cleaning nightmare doors you have ever seen. Add that to the fact that he insisted on doing the installation in January with a temperature at a whopping 30 degrees, while I must endure having the 5 cats and 2 dogs locked in a multitude of rooms barking, meowing, scratching and fighting, which could be heard easily over the endless pounding, sawing, metal filing, slamming door installation production. Perhaps no big deal for others, yet trying working from your home office that requires endless hours of telephone time and concentration to detail while being assaulted with this auditory stimulation nightmare! Oh, should I also mention the fact that now suddenly after 13 years, one of the doors now has to open the completely opposite direction as the "new, improved door" won't fit opening the way we are used to doing it? As long as I'm on a roll here, I should also mention that the hardware on this pair of doors is shiny gold. Have I told you how much I detest shiny gold anything? Well, I do. He knows it. My family knows it. I hate yellow gold jewelry although I do have yellow gold engagement ring and yellow gold wedding ring. At the time, couldn't afford what I wanted, so got the yellow gold. No big whoop. Still gives me yellow gold jewelry after all these years, "thanks I say" and wear it anyway. Buy my own jewelry all the time and if there is ever a choice, it is white gold or silver. Period.

I digress here. So, moved into Prince's house when we were married to find shiny gold EVERYWHERE. Light fixtures, switchplates, register covers, knobs. You name it, it was shiny gold. It has taken several years to replace these items to ones that we like, (well I like). No offense meant to others who love the look, just isn't my cup of tea. Love the look in other homes, just don't want it in mine. See, Prince is a real live cowboy. Home decor is somewhere between western, southwestern, barnyard looking. Shiny gold just doesn't "go" with that. My bed, coat rack, towel bars, bedside tables, coffee table, and living room lamps are all made of horseshoes. Real live previously nailed to the horse hoof and stepped in shit shoes. (Sandblasted and painted after welding into fabulous furniture of course). Kitchen is black and white, and a real picket fence is nailed to the "dining room" wall. Country, weird, comfy home. NOT shiny gold accent kind of place. Add that to two kids who until recently (well even now) touch every thing in site with dirty, sticky hands leaving instantly noticable fingerprints, especially on anything resembling shiny gold metal. So, when the saleman arrives to arrange this purchase, he shows us this ugly ass door with shiny gold hardware. After two hours of haggling, hubby says"What do you think?" I say "It is the ugliest door I have ever seen, too much money, and I HATE the hardware." He says, "Fine. We'll take two of them." So, I have two bright, shiny gold hardware doors. Now, I know, you are thinking just shut up and be thankful for your brand new "energy efficient" doors that are replacing two screen doors that did not match, and the front one had the glass replaced YEARS ago when my son shot out the glass with his blow gun. All we had was a piece of smoke colored plexiglass, so that's what went in the door. Or, well now you have larger glass area to let in more light to your home that only has one large window in the living room and these two doors will allow light in your home. Yeah, I hear ya. Also must confess that we are smokers. (Don't even start with me on this one, yes I know better) This makes it mandatory to have at least one of our wood doors open at all times to allow me to open the window on the screen door so we aren't overcome with our own pollution. Which means I have to look at the screen door all the time. Now all I see is the shiny, gold hardware and the six more feet of glass covered in finger and nose prints! Now, he expects me to bow to him with appreciation for his genius in improving the appearance and energy efficiency of our doors. WRONGO COWBOY! Number 1, they are ugly, Number 2, you don't have to clean them, I do, Number 3, how energy efficient can a door be with the glass open a foot to let out the smoke? Yeah, shut up and stop whining now. Enough.

Wow, am I negative or what? Sorry, just had to let it out somewhere. Too much work and not enough play makes me bitchy.

3 comments:

Cindy said...

You need a hug! I know how you feel about men not getting the whole decorating thing. I lived with that too when I was married! It's probably the best thing about not being married. I can make all the choices. Hmmm...I wonder if there is something you can do to the shiny gold hardware to make it not so shiny.

Elle Jay Bee said...

Is it wrong to say that I thoroughly enjoyed reading that? Not that I am enjoying your misery, just that I enjoy knowing that others feel that way, too, sometimes.

Cindy is right, you do need a hug, or even better...a glass of wine to drown your sorrows! Life does suck somedays, even when we know we "shouldn't" feel that way. I chalk mine up to hormones or daily irritations...either way, I could certainly rant like that somedays!!

Hope you feel better soon, but honestly, I would be mad too for getting shiny ass (oops, I mean breass) hardware on my doors!! Is it something that can be changed? They do sell replacement parts for screen doors...it's worth a look!

I am so sorry about your Dad...you must miss him very much. The two just don't mix well...no matter how many days in between.

Linda
xoxo

Tara said...

Loved your comments--they ring so true!

Nice to visit your blog, just began mine hope you can hop over! Tara
http://daysmissedonahammock.blogspot.com/