Wedding cont.:It's all in the details baby!

Ok, so I promised I would get to the good stuff, but then the pro photos came in I am completely sidetracked again. Please forgive me as I give you a peek at some of the details that drive me over the edge of sanity in this wedding.

So, I mentioned before how we nearly forgot the important stuff, like the borrowed jewelry, the veils, etc. Well guess what, we did forget completely to put on the garter!

Here I am putting the darn thing on after the ceremony is already finished! Better late than never, right? Wrong, some-one-who-shall-remain-nameless-but-on-my-hit-list, insists that you can't do it after, as it is only lucky if you wear it down the damn aisle! Who seriously makes up this crap we do anyway? Well, fixed the nameless-ones-ass!

Here is the Princess strutting up and down the damn aisle wearing the garter to show said nameless person where they could shove that opinion....You go girl! Who said it had to be on the aisle in the damn ceremony anyway?

So, anyway, I digress....I sat for hours pouring thru the seriously 3000+ photos we recieved from the photographer! Are you kidding me, I thought I was obsessed with this? Some are purely divine, others suck, and many make you ponder why in the world.... So, here are a few of my favorites for you.

First, Princess was sitting on the deck waiting as usual for Mom to show up and bustle the damn dress already so she could dance. Well, I finally find a darn pin to grab the loops with, run up to where she was sitting, look down and this is what we see

A lady bug crawling on her lap! Cute as can be darn little bug. But wait, Princess destests anything remotely buggy or buzzy, EXCEPT ladybugs which she learned from a young age were #1-good luck, #2-vital to Mom's garden and killing one would result in punishment of massive proportions. So, we try to catch this little rascal to put him back where he belongs. And what do we see?



This lucky bug was a baby with only TWO spots, just like the happy couple! And he wasn't ready to leave yet which gave the groom a chance to chase around her skirt for awhile... Some things are just meant to be I guess. Funny though with all the stress and chaos of the day I completely forgot this touching time until I saw these photos. Lucky for us someone knew how odd we are and that this would make me smile. Thanks Alan! Then again, do not risk enlarging this one for a closer peek unless you want to be horrified at the stray cat hair clinging to her dress. Hey, priorities girl, I told you my house didn't get clean and a fancy dress doesn't not register fear in the eyes of my herd-ANYONE is fair game for a fur ball or two....



So, hours later, eyes glazed and everything begins to look alike. But wait, you suddenly open a shot like this...

This I like to fondly call my "WTF hawk photo". Are you joking here dude? We pay you by the hour for photos of the big day, Princess, etc. and we get sent a random shot of the damn hawk that lives in the tree at Princess's new home? The same hawk that lives for the day he can catch her precious little dogs unaware and eat them for breakfast? That hawk? The one who I secretly cherish as he assists with rodent patrol in my garden in the winter, but shhhh, don't tell Princess. Oh hell, I have small dog too and cat that thinks he owns the yard, oh well, Ralph has made it 15 years with this hawk family and he's still kickin' right? But a photo in the wedding album? WTF right?

OK, calm down MOM, NOT. Tons of great shots of my not so great yard, decor, smiles etc. then again I see this....

This I call my" WTF light picture". Dude, you are killing me here. All the decor we slaved to assemble and arrange and you take a pic of the damn solar light we forgot to take down that is covered in dirt? Now at night, pretty damn cool light, but seriously here. WTF?

OK, shortly after this I had to eat crow, or hawk perhaps because look what this brilliant man made my paper (clearance sale no less) lanterns look like

OK, said photographer rocks afterall, I forgive you for the bizzarre shots now really I do. Almost makes me wish I had a serious camera that can make things look like this. Almost.



Now, back to details, details, details. We stumbled on this great Kleenex in the clearance bins at Michaels last summer before the not to be wedding date. Bought a boat load for 50 cents a pop to use for the wedding. I laid them on the chairs in the family row (good move Lisa-major use there) and scattered around the reception area. Here is a sneak peak of a after wedding shot when Princess and her new MIL are exchanging some touching moments. It all started when she thanked her for having the groom and letting her share him...ahhh...then came the flood...but wait, check out the kick ass tissue!

One of many patterns you will see scattered in use over this series. Grab some gals if you find them. Strong, sturdy, great touch. You will notice though in a later shot of the bride crying at the alter, old mom stuck a plain white one in my bouquet to carry just in case. It ended up going to the bride, good move as it was soaked and clenched in her fist, color may have bled otherwise. Note to future maid of honors out there, put a clean tissue in your flowers to hand the bride, and one for you. Just in case!

OK, enough about bodily fluids. Lets see decor here.

This is a shot of part of the bride and groom table. Notice clearance sale frames from Michaels (50 cents) supposed to be place card holders. Flip over insert and write whatever the heck you want. Use frame later for photos, genious and cheap. Also piled a flower garland on the table, clearance at JoAnn's. Pretty good shot of overlay fabric. Colors were Hot Pink, Chocolate Brown, and Teal. Groom was growing sick of the "pink theme" and so humored him with the teal overlay for their table. Had cool beading. Also overlay runner of another fabric with butterfly motif and sparkles. Candle was from prior wedding date, massive smell of pumpkin spice, kind of yummy.



Love this one!

Another shot of different overlay, pink with silver sparkles. How cool does the ivy bowl with floating (clearance candles) look? Gems from craft store in bottom. Bridesmaid Lisa bought box of these at garage sale with 30 of them for $5! Scattered candy hearts from Valentine clearance on tables. Glimpse of our home creation custom fortune cookie favor boxes. Princess saw them in a catalog, $2 a piece-just for the cookie. Nope, Oriental trading gives you a bag of 50 for like $10, boxes from them too super cheap (buy extra, the boxes are hard plastic and some broke during some assembly required). We hand dipped and sprinkled three varieties. Some blue (white chocolate candy coating), some brown (peanut butter), some dark brown (dark chocolate-all candy coating from Wilton's with coupons at Michaels). Whole process took 4 of us less than 2 hours to coat, sprinkle, assemble and fill boxes. Stickers were made at Shutterfly.com to hold it all shut. Now, let me tell you now. My assistants set these on the tables as I instructed them ahead of ceremony. BAD MOVE. Sun=melted chocolate. Good news=solid again when cool and still taste great.

Here is a better shot of the top of the boxes. Kinda cute huh? We did something like 50 of them, tons of extra everything and still didn't spend over $30 on the whole favor deal. The cookies read inside "Thanks for sharing our wedding day!" So what if it isn't a custom message. If I had ordered it all done plus boxes, plus stickers, you are looking at over $100 for the same damn thing.



Now, let me show you what really happens to these babies in the sun. These were extra we wanted on the buffet table. Were left in tupperware, in the sun....

sticky, gooey, melted, yummy mess most of which were stuck together hence the wrong colors on some cookies... Oh well, live and learn.



Now, remember when I mentioned the miniature gazebo at the rehearsal? Well, day of, up it came and was tied severely to the deck. See, prior to the day, we planned this for emergency rain backup, all guests stand deal. Well, Prince Charming decided you can't put this up last second like I wanted, so he had to do it ahead of time part way. So, he got it up half height and left it in the center of this deck. Well, that night, along came the MASSIVE wind and drove this Major steel structure clear across the deck and caused huge tears in the screening on two sides. Plus, I have to now find a way to put it in the design instead of the backup last minute idea. So, it got shoved to the corner, tables moved to shelter the cake and guest book/gift table. Not too shabby after Prince spent an hour tying on ribbon to hold up the darn screen to not decapitate our guests.

So, this gives you an idea of the final product and a glimpse of the other set of paper lanterns my decorators chose to hang inside. Not what I wanted, but tough. Gotta delegate and live with it!


Ok, so I thought you would like to see the guest book instructions. Rather complicated but I thought with this, plus a couple of us did ours ahead for reference.

Wrong, most guests completely screwed it up, but hey, can't blame a girl for trying can you?

Here is the desert menu. We had expected an important guest who can not have gluten in any form. So, I thought I better find a way to tell him what was safe. Dollar store frame, menu on cardstock, pretty slick deal. Said guest did not even come..... Now notice, item one on the list is the veggie tray that NEVER made it to the table, nor did any dip. Oh hell. Glad my helpers all had college degrees and a million instructions are you?

Here is the desert menu, same deal. Was SUPPOSED to be on the cake table, you know, desert menu..........NOT. On same food table with the darn gluten free cookies.

Here is a shot of the food spread. If you plan any hot food, get one of those great food warmer/server deals at Costco for $29! Awesome and you don't have to use the tubs, you can remove and have a flat hot plate! All the platters and serveware were from Walmart, thrift stores, personal items etc. Plastic plates were cheaper at the grocery store locally than web sites. Dually crockpots kind of funny and unplanned, both Mom's have the same darn one!

Random, but my friend Lisa is MORE OCD than I am. Check out the lovely fruit plate she crafted (minus the kiss ass dip I had to serve with it still in the fridge darn it).



OK, enough food, lets see something else.

Ok, remember how blonde Mom forgot the damn jewelry and our brillant photographer reminded us at the last second? Well, here are the shots.

This one shows her putting on the "borrowed" piece of her puzzle. They are the diamond earrings that were the last gift my father gave my mother before he died. I wanted her to wear the matching necklace, but had no idea the chain was so darn long. I am wearing that one, the longest one nestled in my saggy boobs over there....nice scratches everywhere from trimming the damn rose bushes last minute too.

So instead, she wore one of my "fake diamond" QVC necklaces she loves. Pretty sure she was begging to keep it not borrow it. Not happening. Also disregard the piles of crap in the background including her bra on the dresser...




OK, seriously bad hair and wrinkles

But damn I love this beautiful girl that is my baby, and is now all grown up!




More important details here.

Ruby slippers for my pretty...ha! Check out the teal toe nail polish mom had to put on her at midnight the night before. Ross Dress 4 Less-$16! Mom scores again!

(disregard trash in gutter in our street..)



More

shoes of course! These were mine, again Ross, whopping $13 for mine and they were pretty comfy. Kind of cool shot of my bouquet (all clearance flowers from Michaels and JoAnnes)


Now lets see some real detail shall we?

I got these cute bags from Oriental Trading for a couple bucks for us to carry the rings in. Cute huh? See her new band peeking thru? Serious bling baby! Her bouquet is behind them.




Even better. This one shows a bit of the lovely hanky Lynn from The Vintage Nest sent for her special day. I wasn't getting the blue part, and Lynn nailed it. I used it to wrap the stems of her bouquet. Right above it is the antique locket that was my Mom's with her photo and my Dad when they were dating I gave her. Can't see it, but it is there.

Better detail of her bouquet. Still clearance flowers gals.

This one shows better how both of ours looked. Plus, the Princess is pretty damn cute isn't she?



Here is a shot of the toss bouquet I made.

Right as she is getting ready to pitch it over her head. But wait, do you see the mountains? That snow came less than a week before this day! Do you feel my anxiety now?



another

A tiny close up of Lisa's bouquet.

and another

Love this shot of Alicia's bouquet! Hers was way different since she was the best "person" for Andrew she got the teal treatment.









Here I am beginning to do the darn bustle on the dress. A lovely lady in town hand did her bustle just perfect, but to get ahold of it to pull up, you have to trace down the seams, locate a TINY thread and pull it out for the loop to the hidden buttons. KEEP a large safety pin handy, you are going to need it. And pay CLOSE attention when they show you how to do it, you will freak when the real time comes!

On to the dreaded cake......

Not bad for home made, sleep deprived, etc. Thank God for the Prince saving me at noon to finish this. He did ALL the pink details just like she wanted.

Here is a close up of the front, she wanted their monogram. see all the pink dots? This isn't easy in a rush I promise you!

Here is the cake topper (clearance at Michaels). The couple had blonde hair when we bought this, groom had yellow spotted tie etc, and bride had yellow flowers. A little acrylic paint, and magic new topper! Grand total=$8






Now, the couple loved the idea of remembering past family. The groom lost his older sister only a couple years ago to a drunk driver. VERY sensitive to anything concerning her. Princess wanted to to a candle, he freaked that if it had her name he couldn't burn it, a vase might break, on and on. So, I stopped asking and did it myself. I got a sale frame with enough slots, reprint favorite pics of those lost souls, printed a poem, and bingo. Now, as I said, he is VERY sentimental over her, so I wanted to sick the frame in a out of the way spot, but would be there none the less. Nope, Princess said stick it in a empty chair in the front row, so her wish was my command.

Just to show you in it's place of honor. This taken right after he walked his "Moms" down the aisle to be seated.

This is the best close up we have. Top left is his sister Lauren, bottom left is my parents, bottom right is my brother Wayne and his baby Duchess all who could not be with us except in spirit this day. Now, if I had it to do over, it WOULD go in an out of the way spot. See, every time ANYONE looked at it we burst out bawling like babies. NOT what you want on a joyous day!

Ok, so I know this is all a bit random and backwards. But you should expect it from me by now.

Here is the aisle preparation saga continuing. Please note, there are already guests seated. The two standing are guests helping my poor Prince finish this mear minutes before the ceremony. He had to double the runner, pin it to the grass, and cover the ugly scrap lumber platform. Good work son!

This is way out of order, but just cracks me up. I had never heard of such a thing, but they insisted on including the Covenant of Salt ceremony in their day.

Now, the idea is you each take grains of salt to share with each other as a symbol of your valuable love. Notice, both appear to have shared a bit too much salt. I really thought their heads would cave in from dehydration at this point and it was close for a bit! HA!

But this does help to explain the next shot. See that cute glass butterfly dish? That's what I got at the thrift store to hold it (50 cents). It is sitting on the other hanky Lynn so generously shared with her to chose from for her "blue" element. Again you see the other one peaking on the bouquet stems. Lynn, you are an incredible person and everyone must RUN to the link on the right for The Vintage Nest. You can also see the homemade unity candle set. Plain candles Princess chose, a bit of ribbon, a couple brads-bingo custom unity candle under $10. Holders were online for like $9 for the set.
Again, cheap overlay fabric on my rusty old outdoor table. Works for me!

Here is a shot they took from behind. See why I made this the back? Small cracks in candle? Not so cute.

Here is the alter fully assembled. Light up arch with coupon at Michaels. Second arch I bought but too darn cold to plant flowers yet. Flower garlands sale at craft stores. See the pearl monogram hanging at top of front arch? Dollar bins at Michaels! See the former date glitter pumpkins in the garden? Massive amounts of rolled tulle (sale and coupons) wrapped into arch.

Here is a shot of the actual aisle. Notice streamers and bows in rows toward the aisle? We had signs directing guests to enter from outside rows. Originally they painstakingly laid silk petals down each side of the runner and made a terrific heart where the couple would stand in petals at the alter. Well, then Mother Nature came along and gave us the casual wind blown look. The MIL had a tearful meltdown, Prince cussed, and I laughed my ass off-what else can you do? Besides, kind of like this look...



Ok folks, like I said it is all in the details. Or rather, it is the damn details that will kill you before you finish. Now, lets move on to some doggy porn shall we?

I present, Princess Gidget and her wedding attire!

Ain't she pretty?








Now you know how she REALLY feels about all this dress up nonsense...

This is her, Grandma, make her stop now look. Sorry Gidget, it only goes downhill from here!




Seriously Grandma, make it stop NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok you spoiled little granddoggie, give grandma a kiss and I'll make it all better!

That's my girl!

This was about the time I vetoed the let her walk herself down the aisle routine. Grandma carried her in style instead like the spoiled rotten girl she is!

Now flash ahead to ceremony is over, Princess is married, and Gidget has finally begged free of her attire.

Look at those ears fly as she shakes of the shame of the dress! Heaven I tell you!






But wait for it, the look of PURE BLISS>>>>>>>>>

Oh baby, I love it when I'm naked!

Ok, enough details and doggy porn for today. More to follow next week I hope. NOW we will get to the actual damn wedding I promise!! Have a great weekend everyone and thanks for indulging my detail parade!